Top 20 Snores

Because I sometimes seem obsessed with music from 2 decades ago, I thought I would look at the top 20 songs based on Launch. Wanna share your opinions?

1) Justin Timberlake – Sexyback. I hate this song. I hate his lazy, off-pitch vocals (and he has done some good songs, just this song sucks all over big time)

2) Chris Brown – Say Good-bye. This is typical pleasant background R&B, meant for mood while scrogging your other half on the rec room couch. Nothing wrong with it, just nothing wow.

3) Beyonce – Déjà vu. Hip hop with rap. A good beat and I like the jazz riff and trumpet sampling, and I really like the half-step stuff on the bridge. It’d be a good song to dance to. Also, like the last part of the chorus. The rap stuff is ho hum boring. Not bad overall, though, got this disco vibe even with the crappy rappy stuff.

4) Cassie – Me & U. Lots of R&B now on the charts. This is a pretty good vegging song, and they do a lot of cool vocal and synth stuff. The harmony is nice – this is one that would be on my MP3 for a couple weeks, just because of the chilly approach, the synth work, and the harmony.

5) Ciara – Get up. Lots of women in the Top 20 too, which is good. More plunky synth – the 80s have influenced the music definitely. This is all starting to sound too similar.

6) Shakira – Hips Don’t Lie. Same as the others, except with a Jamaican influence and without the 80s synth. Wow, it’s amazing how little variety there is. I do like the Latin influence, I like the chanting, and I like her simple voice. Toddie? You like this stuff and you don’t think it all sound very similar?

7) Fergie – London Bridge – Twice now they’ve asked me if I’m “ready for this.” Ready for what? Shear boredom? This phrase was cliché, along with the constant “Oh Snap” shit, like 10 years ago. Heavy hip-hop rap with very little singing. This one sucked.

8) Jessica Simpson – A Public Affair. I do like that Beyonce, Christina Aplegate, and Ricky Martin are in the video. Wow, pure disco, roller skates and all. She stole the bass line from Madonna. She’s got a blah voice, but this is fluffy dance song, so… Eh, feh…

9) Lyfe Jennings – S.E.X. Jesus, he starts with “Yo yo!” How f*cking cliché is that? Well, at least his voice is unique. Like a male Macie Gray. Other than that, this is boring.

10) Pussycat Dolls – Buttons. With Snoop Dog. His rapping is better, and their harmony is better than the other stuff I’ve heard. Interesting Middle Eastern influence, but only singing over rhythm mostly. Not different enough to stand out. Wow, as a style, this is a little more than just dull, it’s like super-dull.

11) Rihanna – Unfaithful. Throbbing base, strings, and ghostly slow piano. Good start. Then she ruins it by singing. Adenoidal. That’s the term. Someone with a better voice could’ve really made this song, because the songwriting is not bad.

12) Nelly Furtado. Better beat than others. God, these all sound the same!!!

13) Pyublic version of the Jessica Simpson song. Hehe, watching fans do this song is actually funny.

14) Paris Hilton – Stars are Blind. And deaf and dumb too. The instrumentation is pure Ace of Base. This sound like Peach Union. She’s weak vocally, but the song is trying to be catchy in a sing-in-your-car way. Doesn’t quite hit it.

15) Yung Joc – I Know You See It. This completely sucks, in a rap garage band with no talent sort of way.

16) Panic! At the Disco – I Write Sins not Tragedies. Catchiest title so far. Rangy punk-pop. Not bad.

17) Christina Aguilera – Ain’t No Other Man. The best song out of the list. She does the R&B thing, but she kicks butt. This is catchier, more interesting, and more fun than all the others.

18) Sean Paul – Give It Up To Me. And we’re back to sucky. At least he raps differently than most.

19) Kelis – Bossy. Well, at least Ms. Milkshake has attitude. Other than that, this sucks.

OK, I’m going back to alternative-ville and retro-town. Most of this is undistinguishable R&B/Hip-Hop with very little unique creativity. It’d be cool if one of them could do something that’d blow all these clichés out of the water.